Anticipation

That’s it! I’ve found it… the key to happiness! I am absolutely giddy, and do you know what caused it? You might think it’s because I’m eating Ben and Jerry’s Cherry Garcia ice cream, or that my jeans went on a little easier this morning, or that I am on vacation, but none of those things are it. I bought a plane ticket, today! I’m going to the beach!

Isn’t it funny? I’m not in Florida. I’m going to be in Florida. Yep. The anticipation of going to Florida has me reeling. And as any child who has ever looked forward to Christmas morning can tell you, the anticipation of all of the great things to come is what has me most excited. I am anticipating drinking Rum Runners. I am anticipating lying on the beach. I am anticipating feeling that warm shower that I take to wash the sand and salt off my skin, and then cranking the tunes in my condo while I put on my make-up to go out for the evening. My body is practically shaking with joy!

Here is what I know: Christmas morning was never as fun as thinking about Christmas morning was. The movie that everyone said that I absolutely had to see was never as good as I thought it would be. And my vacation will be only three nights long, may or may not include good weather, and could possibly result in a sunburn. Still, I cannot wait! And as long as I am excitedly anticipating something, anything at all, I am about as happy as I’ll ever be. Experiences (good or bad) are the rich and wonderful sensation of being human and alive. Memories are often lovely, if bitter-sweet, and good for my inner tranquility. But the anticipation of fabulous things? Now, that’s where it’s at!

One of the things I talk about in my seminars is vision writing. I encourage people to write what they want their future to be. Part of the motivation for that is because I believe that, in order to get what you want, you have to be clear about what you want. Part of it, though, is because the anticipation of living your own dream life is one of the best ways to remain joyful. Furthermore, research shows that people suffering from depression tend to only anticipate negative future experiences, so the anticipation of positive experiences may just be the key to battling the blues.

This week, I encourage you to plan something. Anticipate something positive. No matter how far in the future you have to plan it in order for it to be believable for you (I always feel good when I review my plan to walk up the driveway to my own writer’s cabin in the mountains, for example, but that’s at least 10 years away…), write about or take the first step toward something wonderful! It’s fun to think about what’s coming, what could be, what might be, what will be... And who among us could not stand a little more fun?

Red Shoes

The other day at work, while I was in a patient’s room, I caught part of an episode of “The View.” Two of the four women hosting the show had amazing, red, stiletto-heeled sandals. The strappy kind. Very pretty. Not very practical, from a “shoes are for keeping feet warm and dry and for walking miles in” standpoint, but that’s ok with me. Most of my shoes, save the ones I nurse in, are not very practical either. What really struck me, though, was that one woman was wearing a purple dress, and the other was wearing a green and white one.

My mother was a fashion buyer while I was growing-up. At one time, she even owned a little boutique downtown that offered cutting edge fashions, bought in places like Chicago and New York. This was before designers had their own shops anywhere but places like Rodeo Drive, so I have always felt that I have been bred with the blessing of a certain amount of fashion flair. Still, red shoes are daring to me. If I were to wear them, it would be with a matching red dress, and probably only for evening. Or, perhaps, at my most wild of times, I could put them with gray or black, or hide them under jeans, as long as I had some sort of red shirt or scarf to tie the outfit together. I know that’s probably stuffy, or old-fashioned, or rigid of me, but I have to admit that I have certain things, most of which are as unremarkable as color coordination, that I “wouldn’t dare do.” Could this be distancing me from my joy?

These girls did not have my same sense of fashion, which I’ve now identified as a symptom of my timidity and attachment to rules. They, in fact, wore no trace of red, anywhere… except on their feet. And they looked amazing!

Something about that burst of bright, or the irreverence of failing to color coordinate, or the way they reminded me of Dorothy’s ruby red slippers’ magical quality, made me realize that I might just be missing the point of dressing.  I wonder if I make myself wear something, everyday, that feels just a little irreverent, or magical, or bright like the sun winking, if I would feel just a little more powerful, just a little better equipped, just a little shinier.

I haven’t quite decided what that special something will be for my practical nursing days spent dressed in scrubs, but tomorrow, I’m going to find some strappy, skinny-heeled, fabulous red sandals, and I’m going to wear them with everything else I own.

The Living In Joy Challenge: Each day for a week, find something you would normally “never do,”: wear a headband, go out without make-up, pin a rhinestone brooch to your jean jacket, use your good crystal wine glasses for water or milk, park in the farthest parking spot, stop to walk in the park on your way home, express your feelings, take a risk, and do it. And please do share how you feel about it. I can’t wait to hear from you.J

Welcome to Living In Joy

Hello!

I'm Shelly. I'm a nurse at a major metroplitan trauma center in Nashville, Tennessee, and I am ever fascinated by the changes, trials, pains, celebrations, and riches offered by life, and how people manage them. Moreover, as I work beside some of the most talented and beautiful people, who also have chosen caregiving as a profession, I am often struck by the fact that these caregivers completely fail to nurture themselves.

I do not think that failure is specific to nurses. So, I am starting this blog with weekly updates as an attempt to reflect on some aspects of life that I find curious. I'll also be sharing with you some strategies I have found, that help me to remain in touch with the joy of life that prevails, even when things are difficult. Regardless of the profession you have chosen, I hope to remind you in some way of your dreams, your passions, and your appreciation of this playground that is life in this world. I hope to entertain you in some way, or allow you a moment to reflect, or remind you that life is for living. In short, I hope to reconnect you, or help you to remain connected, to your joy.

Thank you for reading!

Shelly